Overcoming the Battle Within

January 11, 2025

In less than a week, I’ll be stepping up to the challenge of running the Addo elephant trail run, navigating 50 km of rugged beauty through South Africa’s third-largest national park.

These past six months leading up to the race have been an odyssey of transformation, pushing me away from everyday comfort and ease into a realm of relentless discipline and unparalleled strength.

It has been a path to discovering what I’m truly capable of, both physically and mentally.

Life, however, thrives on the unexpected.

The narrative of my life has been woven with challenges, and I wouldn’t be walking my path if there were no unexpected challenges to overcome. This time, I’m facing an injury to my ankle and shins that derail the hard-earned progress achieved through months of hard work and dedication.

Yet, over the years, I’ve learned that every challenge conceals a gift, a lesson in resilience and perseverance.

And this is my call to stay focused on what I can do, on the next steps I can take and to play the cards that I’ve been dealt rather than giving in to the nagging voice within.

So, in the run-up to the race and the countdown to what will likely be one of the most challenging experiences of my life (so far!), I made it a daily practice to see my physio, Rene Naylor — a very skilled lady who not only has the magic hands that treated the Springboks during the World Cup but also wears the hat of a mindset and performance coach.

Over the past 4 weeks, we adjusted my training, took off the load from my legs and focused on the activities that could keep my eyes on the race while being kinder to my body — implementing rest, dry needles, shock wave therapy and ice baths to get me race-ready.

Then, last Sunday — with permission from Rene — I set out on a relatively short “test” race of 15 km. I started confidently, thinking I was on the better end of my recovery. But the little confidence that I had built up quickly faded away during the first 5 km as the reality of my situation set in.

Every step felt like a reminder of my injury, a sharp jab that said, “You’re not ready” — which was a humbling experience. One that left me wrestling with a cocktail of emotions — frustration, disappointment, defeat, but also a stubborn spark of determination that refused to be extinguished.

This was a bitter wake-up call — I was hoping to be more ready, to still set out for the ADDO trail run with my original goals and ambitions. But, this isn’t the case — which is a tough pill to swallow.

But, Rene’s been an absolute powerhouse in helping me navigate this mental minefield. She’s been equal parts therapist and coach, reminding me that recovery isn’t just about healing the body but also about tending to the mind.

When I entered her office on Monday I felt defeated, and my inner victim had taken the driver’s seat — a part of me (a rather vocal one!) wanted to use this injury as an excuse to throw in the towel and take the easy way out — a place to rest my head and say, “I tried.”

As I expressed my concerns, she looked at me and said listen, Jordy:

“I know this s*cks, but you don’t how you’re going to feel on race day. Maybe you’ll feel worse, maybe you’ll feel the same. But if you want to feel better, you got to stay focused now.”

This taught me, for better or worse, that worry is a misuse of imagination — and by getting out of my head and snapping myself back to reality, I can focus on what’s right in front of me and what I’m able to do in this stage of my journey.

We all get so caught up trying to control the uncontrollable that we forget the power of the single step we can take right now. It’s an interesting phenomenon that most of us get to deal with on a day-to-day basis.

However, what we must understand is that the world around us is basically made up of only two factors: The things we can control and the things we can’t.

Everything falls into these two categories and one of the most productive ways to improve your mental health, confidence, and resilience is by learning how to differentiate between these two.

Because when we try to control the uncontrollable we become obsessed and depleted.

When we are obsessed and depleted, we go into survival mode.

When we are in survival mode, we become blind to the things that are within our power.

When we are blind to the things that are within our power, we become paralysed.

And when we are paralysed, we reinforce the belief that we are powerless.

Which is one of the biggest lies that stands in the way of what we want and deserve.

My advice?

Don’t worry about the entirety of the journey ahead. Accept where you are, and focus on what you can do right now — the very next step. Because there is always one more step that you can take.

And if you’re in a similar sort of situation — facing down your own personal giants, feeling the weight of disappointment, or battling the seductive urge to give up when the finish line seems to get pulled further away — then I invite you to try what’s been working for me:

Write down everything you’re worried about and split them into two lists; one that lists the things and activities that are out of your control, and the other with what is within your control.

The things that are outside of your control? Practice radical acceptance.

The things that are within your control? Practice radical responsibility.

Every crossed-out item frees up mental space for truly matter and what you actually have the power to change — leaving only what serves you and your journey forward.

If there’s one big takeaway from Rene and this whole experience — it’s to be where you are and to do what you can. No excuses.

There are two wolves that fight every day within all of us.

One is fear, doubt and resignation — the wolf that sees an obstacle and wants to turn back, overwhelmed by the magnitude of the challenge ahead. This wolf feeds on our insecurities, whispering that we may as well throw in the towel, that we can’t overcome, and that it’s better to give up than to fail.

It’s the voice that amplifies our anxieties, making obstacles and challenges seem like impossibly high walls between where we are and where we want to go.

The other wolf embodies courage, resilience and perseverance. It’s the part of us that looks at a challenge and sees an opportunity for growth, a test of our strength and determination. This wolf thrives on the steps we can take right now, no matter how small.

It’s fueled by the belief in our own capabilities and the understanding that any journey worth embarking on won’t be easy. But rather than deter us, these can difficulties propel us forward, forging us into stronger, more resilient versions of ourselves.

The question is which wolf wins?

The one that you feed.

Which one are you feeding?

PS. The story of the two wolves is an age-old Cherokee story that I put my own twist on for this newsletter.

To pay my respects to the story, I’ve included the link here if you want to see the original.

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